Why Rest Feels So Hard—and How to Change That
In a world obsessed with productivity, rest often feels like an act of rebellion. We’re conditioned to believe that more effort equals more success, but the truth is, our best ideas, deepest resilience, and most vibrant energy come when we honor the rhythms of rest.
And yet, so many of us struggle to rest. Why? Because the beliefs we hold about rest sabotage our ability to pause and recharge. Let’s explore the underlying myths that keep us stuck, the ways we misunderstand rest, and practical tools to help us truly renew.
Beliefs That Sabotage Rest
- “My Work = My Worth”
We tie our self-worth to our output, making it hard to pause without guilt. - “Rest is Lazy”
Rest is often misinterpreted as idleness when, in reality, it’s an essential part of recovery and creativity. - “I’ll Fall Behind”
The fear of losing momentum keeps us stuck in cycles of overwork, even when our productivity diminishes. - “I Have to Be in Control”
A need to manage everything can prevent us from delegating and taking the breaks we need. - “More is Better”
We’re taught that doing more is the key to success, even at the cost of our health and joy. - “If I Stop, I’ll Feel Everything”
- Rest can bring up discomfort, like boredom, loneliness, or suppressed emotions, making it easier to keep busy.
- “Rest is Selfish”
- We often feel that prioritising rest means letting others down, but neglecting it makes us less present and effective for those we care about.
Why We Resist Rest
Even when we’re physically still, our minds often race. This mental resistance to rest can stem from:
- Guilt: Feeling selfish or lazy for pausing.
- Perfectionism: Believing rest signals failure or lack of commitment.
- Fear: Worrying that stepping away will lead to falling behind or losing control.
- Discomfort: Resting often brings up feelings we’ve been avoiding, like boredom or loneliness.
The Cost of Not Resting
When we deny ourselves rest, the body and mind rebel. Anxiety escalates, exhaustion deepens, and our creativity and focus dwindle. Over time, this can lead to burnout, physical illness, and an inability to show up for ourselves or others.
What Rest Really Is (and Isn’t)
Rest isn’t just about stopping. True rest is about allowing your mind and body to shift from active processing (task mode) to passive processing (reflection mode). It’s during passive processing that we integrate experiences, solve problems, and make meaning.
What isn’t restful:
- Scrolling social media
- Watching TV mindlessly
- Switching tasks or multitasking
These activities may distract us but rarely provide the deep renewal we’re craving.
Embrace These 7 Types of Rest
To truly thrive, we need more than just sleep—we need to engage in all seven types of rest to address the different ways we expend energy.
- Physical Rest
- Involves taking a break from physical exertion. This includes not only sleep but also activities like stretching, deep breathing, or simply sitting still.
- Try This: Take a short nap, lie down and stretch, or practice gentle yoga.
- Mental Rest
- Means quieting your racing thoughts and giving your mind a break from constant stimulation.
- Try This: Set aside time for silence, take intentional screen breaks, or engage in mindfulness exercises like deep breathing.
- Emotional Rest
- Involves releasing emotional labor and allowing yourself to feel without judgment.
- Try This: Share your feelings with someone you trust, journal honestly about your emotions, or practice self-compassion.
- Sensory Rest
- Reduces overstimulation from lights, screens, sounds, and other sensory input.
- Try This: Dim the lights, put away your devices, or spend time in a quiet, soothing environment.
- Creative Rest
- Refreshes your imagination and inspiration, often by experiencing beauty or engaging in creative activities.
- Try This: Visit a gallery, walk in nature, or engage in creative play like painting or writing.
- Social Rest
- Means balancing your social interactions by spending time with people who uplift you and setting boundaries with draining relationships.
- Try This: Prioritize quality time with loved ones or enjoy solitude when needed.
- Spiritual Rest
- Involves connecting to a deeper sense of purpose or meaning, whether through meditation, gratitude, or practices that align with your values.
- Try This: Reflect on what brings meaning to your life or practice acts of kindness.
The Art of Stillness
Stillness is more than the absence of activity—it’s the presence of awareness. It’s about tuning out external stimuli and reconnecting with yourself. In stillness, we can:
- Listen to our inner wisdom
- Release mental clutter
- Recalibrate our energy
Try This:
- Sit quietly for 5 minutes, focusing on your surroundings—the light, the sounds, the air.
- Ask yourself: “What do I need right now to feel restored?”
- Repeat affirmations like: “Stillness is where my strength is renewed.”
Reframing Rest as a Strength
Rest is not lazy. It’s not indulgent. It’s a necessary act of self-leadership, resilience, and renewal. When we rest, we:
- Complete the stress cycle and restore balance.
- Honor our boundaries and reconnect with our inner needs.
- Create the space for creativity, joy, and clarity to emerge.
Ask yourself:
- What beliefs about rest hold me back?
- What type of rest do I need most right now?
- How can I embrace rest as a foundation for my thriving?
Rest isn’t about surviving. It’s about reclaiming your energy, your creativity, and your spark.
Start small. Start today. Because you are made for more, and rest is your way to step into it.
Reclaiming Rest: A Call to Action
Rest is not weakness. It’s not laziness. It’s an essential part of your well-being. When you rest, you honor your worthiness, your boundaries, and your need to thrive.
The question isn’t “Do I have time to rest?” but rather “What kind of rest do I need right now?”
Start small. Start today. Because rest isn’t just about surviving—it’s about reclaiming your spark.