We cannot selectively numb emotions. When we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions. – Brené Brown
What Are Emotions, Really?
Emotions are not weaknesses. They are messengers.
They are energy in motion (e-motion), designed to move through us, to inform us, to reveal where we are aligned—or misaligned—with ourselves and the world.
Each emotion carries vital information:
- Anger signals a boundary has been crossed.
- Fear alerts us to danger—or the edges of growth.
- Sadness honors what mattered to us.
- Joy lights the path of what nourishes us.
When we block, suppress, or bypass these messengers, we lose access to their wisdom.
What Does It Mean to ‘Process’ Emotions?
Processing emotions means moving through them consciously rather than being hijacked by them—or shutting them down.
It looks like:
- Recognising what you feel
- Allowing the feeling without judgment
- Investigating where it lives in your body and your story
- Nurturing yourself with compassion
This is beautifully captured in Tara Bach’s RAIN Method:
- Recognise what’s happening [Your Body holds Infinite Clues about what is happening for you. Slow down and pay attention to your physical experiences]
- Allow the experience to be there, just as it is
- Investigate with gentle curiosity
- Nurture yourself with self-compassion
[Grab your worksheet you can use to guide yourself through RAIN!]
But RAIN is just one way. Processing can also happen through:
- Journaling your raw, uncensored feelings
- Moving your body (dance, walks, yoga)
- Breathwork and somatic practices
- Creative expression (art, singing, poetry)
- Speaking your truth to someone safe
The key is: movement, expression, acceptance.
Feelings are much like waves: we can’t stop them from coming, but we can choose which ones to surf. – Jonatan Mårtensson
The Consequences of Not Processing Emotions
When we don’t process emotions, they don’t disappear—they mutate.
They show up as:
- Chronic anxiety or depression
- Addictions and compulsions
- Unresolved conflicts and resentment
- Physical illness and chronic fatigue
- Disconnection from our passions and purpose
Unprocessed emotions silently drive behaviours we don’t understand—and keep us trapped in autopilot, repeating patterns that hurt us and those we love.
It dictates the quality of our life experience and directs the impact we have in the world in spite of our best and highest intentions.
Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing we’ll ever do. – Brené Brown
The Gifts of Processing Emotions
When you develop the skill of processing emotions, everything changes:
- You respond instead of reacting.
- You lead yourself—and others—with wisdom.
- You heal relationships by showing up whole.
- You feel lighter, clearer, and freer.
- You reclaim your creative, courageous self.
As I often say: Healed people heal people.
If you truly want to change your life, your relationships, your work, and your world—this is where it starts.
Not with the perfect dream.
Not with the perfect plan.
💙 But with the willingness to feel what is real inside you—and trust that moving through it will take you exactly where you need to go.
🧡 If you want to save money, process your emotions.
💛 If you want to lose weight, process your emotions.
🩷 If you want to lead, love, and live with impact, process your emotions.
This is the alpha skill.
It requires vulnerability, courage, and a trust that defies logic.
And it’s the bridge between surviving and thriving.
“Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.” – Khalil Gibran
10 Small Shifts for Big Magic:
- Pause and name the emotion you’re feeling.
- Say “this belongs” instead of “this shouldn’t be happening.”
- Find the emotion in your body and breathe into it.
- Write a letter from your emotion’s point of view.
- Move your body when you feel stuck.
- Ask yourself: “What is this emotion trying to teach me?”
- Practice allowing tears, laughter, and all forms of release.
- Remember: No feeling is final.
- Use the RAIN method as a regular ritual.
- Offer yourself radical self-compassion, no matter what arises.
Reading List for Deeper Exploration:
- Radical Acceptance – Tara Brach
- The Language of Emotions – Karla McLaren
- Permission to Feel – Marc Brackett
- Atlas of the Heart – Brené Brown
Playlist for Processing Emotions:
- Let It Go – James Bay
- Breathe Me – Sia
- Rise Up – Andra Day
- Tightrope – Janelle Monáe
- Shake It Out – Florence + The Machine
- Brave – Sara Bareilles
- Hi Ren – Ren [My favourite at the moment]
Want to cultivate sturdier boundaries, but don’t know where to start?
Book your complimentary Power Pause Coaching session and start your journey to Ease.
